That's what Xanga is trying to say on its frontpage right about now.
Seriously.
That's Xanga's message to women. Scrub 'em good! By the way, I was messing with my tablet and made that.
Every time I check on Xanga, I always see at least one misogynistic post on the front. Maybe it's just bad timing, but it's still something. The site is screaming at me: "Women are stupid, trying to say that they've been suffering from prejudice and sexism. Women are annoying little idiots. I can't stand women."
Chill out, Xanga. Have a pill.
There. Now we're better.
Basically what I'm seeing is a bunch of stupid generalizations about the female population. Some of these generalizations coming from females themselves. Now, I have no problem with having opinions and such, but...people...I hope you realize that this is a public site, and although it's "just the internet," your post would still cause you to be beaten up and shot if you restated what you typed in the real world.
Please, people, think twice before you post some woman-hating weblog. A kitten dies every time you do that. I don't care for kittens, but I'm sure other people do. Like Nori. She likes ruining porn with them.
But really. At least consider other people's dignities.
I've recently realized that I haven't been updating on my life often. Maybe it's because I have no life. I don't know.
Anyway, I got sick from standing outside for 45min in subzero weather. It wasn't a pleasant experience, I tell ya. My toes were frozen and numb, and I was limping for awhile.
The bright side is that I've finally ordered a graphics tablet. God only knows whether I'll actually use it, but I'm excited nonetheless. Maybe I'll finally make progress on my artwork. Speaking of which, I haven't finished a piece since...summer. Which I say is pretty sad.
I like trying not to log onto Xanga for as long as possible. I'm always drawn back sooner or later, though. Bleh. I have to update more often. I should write a post on that.
This post will be filled with amazingly controversial material, because everyone else is doing and I wanna be cool like them. Just kidding, I don't have to do that to be cool. I already am cool. I define cool.
Mr. Ice-cube says that he thinks meriibunny is the coolest person alive.
Anyway, here are my very controversial things that I believe in.
1. Brown eyes are better than blue eyes
Yeah, I just said it, bitch. I just defied society. Brown eyes > blue eyes. Brown eyes are all mysterious and smoky and marvelous. Blue eyes are just lacking in melanin.
This is also partially because I myself have brown eyes. They're actually closer to black, but I still consider them brown. I call it, "Asian black."
I am not biased.
2. Honey Nut Cheerios = Best cereal
I don't care WHAT you say. Honey Nut Cheerios are the bomb diggity. They're so versatile, and go with every outfit. They also taste good with or without milk. You can make necklaces with them, and put them on your forehead to make yourself look like you have a really cool bindi. But it's not a bindi. So you fail.
Oh, and their iconic symbol is a cool talking honey bee. If bees were like that IRL then I wouldn't be so scared of them. I'd warmly embrace them, like Jesus to the world.
Yum.
3. Piercings are so overrated
They are! I can't even get into how piercings are overrated. I only have two piercings: one on each ear. And guess what? They're such a hassle. And they're only on my earlobes. Imagine piercings all over. *shudders* That's a lot of rubbing alcohol.
Tattoos are meh. I don't really like them that much. People used to say that I'd definitely get a tattoo one day because I used to draw on myself all the time. Well, you people are wrong. If I got a tattoo, I wouldn't be able to draw on myself on that spot. So ha.
It's sexy, no?
4. The USA is the best nation in the world
Because I'm in it.
*booty booty booty booty rockin' everywhere*
5. Your opinions are stupid
Your opinions are worthless in my eyes? Why? Because they're not mine. And also because I don't like them. My opinions are actually facts. They're that good. Which is why you should make me your fashion consultant, so that I can tell you how hideously fat you look in your new outfit or something.
Ditch that dress quick, girlfriend.
Did you suffer a massive heart attack from reading that? If not, check out this post.
I saw this on John's page, and was like lul. Then I went onto the Xanga front page, and it was all dark and scary. Then I clicked on the side and it brought me to this thing that said I could win stuff. I don't even remember what.Well honestly, I don't care about the prize. I don't want to see this shitty movie. I'm doing this all for John. <33333333 (chode)
My scariest dream must have been when I was a young'un. (A young child, for all you perfect English speakers, pshaw!) It was probably the scariest dream that has ever occured in anyone's mind. It was so disturbing that I am now mentally impaired. Not really, but I like to think of it as that.
I was holding onto one of the steps of my staircase, with one hand. It was a frightening distance below me. The whole house was dark, but I could still make out my surroundings. I looked up and saw something looking at me. Something horrific and terrible, something that nobody should ever have to look at unwillingly.
It was a pumpkin.
A pumpkin, with its face carved out, forming a malicious smile. It said, "Come with me."
I resisted. "No, no, no," I thought. It was to no avail. The pumpkin continued to smile as it loomed over me.
"Do it. Do it."
"No!"
"If you don't, I'll make you fall."
I thought about his threat. This was a pumpkin. It could surely make me fall to my death. "Fine," I said. The pumpkin, never faltering in its smile, helped me up the stairs. It then led me to my bathroom.
It was still very dim, but somehow, the room had a sort of blue lighting. It was bigger, too. I looked around. Everywhere, there were animals. I distinctly saw an alligator, in a bathtub, I think. Then, I noticed, it was sort of like a hospital. A first aid kid lay on the floor. The animals were evil, as was the pumpkin. I froze.
Then, the dream changed. I was now watching a scene. In my bathroom, Madeline and her friends were all hanging around. Most of the girls were in my tub, rowing along. Madeline wanted them to stop. Then, a girl, Chloe I think, said, "I want some hot chocolate."
Suddenly, the girls' faces started to morph and melt. They stared up at Madeline, who was also morphing and melting. They were all hideous. Hideous little French orphans, staring at each other, smiling. Always smiling.
I woke up, in the middle of the night, scared. Traumatized. For three more days, I couldn't think of anything else but that dream. Which, in my opinion, is the scariest dream evar. The scariest nightmare. In the world.
I have never been the same ever since.
I just blogged about my scariest nightmare to enter The Uninvited Scariest Nightmare Contest for 1,000 credits. You can earn free credits too! Brought to you by The Uninvited - In Theaters January 30th.
LOL did you just read that? Way to advertise your product on my blog. Ha. I was about to change it, but then again, that'd probably void my entry. Agh. It sounds like a crappy movie, anyway.
You know how thinspo is thinspiration for people looking to become skinny? I just found out about it. It's intriguing, really...looking at skeletons really does make me lose my appetite.
But, anyway...I was thinking...how about the other way around? What if one wanted to gain weight? You know, put on a few extra pounds here and there. Or everywhere. You know what I mean.
Introducing Fatspo. Fatspo is short for fatspiration. It's inspiration for people who want to look American...er, heavy. Why would you want to be heavy? Well, I don't actually know, but it doesn't seem fair to have a thinspiration without a fatspiration. It's a balance. *gong*
So, I present to you, a bunch of Fatspo images that you can totally download to your computer/print out/tattoo onto yourself in order to remind yourself to get fat, gain weight, eat, etc.
Richard Simmons would not be pleased.
This is a meal from McDonald's. Notice the detail of the bun, the juicy meat, the melted cheese. Oh, and there are fries, too? Oh my Scientology, I can almost taste that delicious crispiness already. And Coca Cola, too. A refreshing, mouthwatering combination. OH MY SCIENTOLOGY. AAHH! SOMEONE GET ME TO A MCDONALD'S RIGHT AWAY.
This, my friends, is a delicious ice cream banana split sundae. Yes. Imagine how that would taste in your mouth. Creamy ice cream of a variety of flavors, two ripe bananas, fresh strawberries, chocolaty fudge, nuts, and a big red cherry to top it all off. Also, there seems to be some yellow goo in there that I'm not quite sure what it could be, but that's not important. Look at the ice cream. Look at it. I know you want it.
Do you see that meat roasting? Do you see it? Now you crave it, ha. Mmm, feel those juices running down your chin as you bite into a sausage. Taste that smokiness trapped within two buns and a layer of ketchup. Do you hear that growling? That's your stomach, telling you to get out of the house, get a grill, and start grilling.
OMGOMGOMG what is that?! Those are nachos, dipped in cheese. Melted cheese, it seems. The saltiness of the nachos goes perfectly with that creamy, hot cheese. Mmm. Me gusta mucho.
RIBS RIBS RIBS. Gah I can't take it anymore. I must eat something. I mean, look at that. Mouthwatering meat with delicious sauce, marinaded to perfection. Slightly burnt, mmm. My tastebuds would tap that. Brownie points for those sneaky fries in the background.
Speaking of brownies...brownies! Who doesn't like a delicious fudge brownie? Chocolaty goodness, my my. They're like cute little cakes, aww. Cute little cakes ready to be eaten. And raped by my stomach.
Hey, is that...steak? And Shrimp? And broccoli? And steak? And wine? And a plate? And steak? Can this get any better? Look at that juicy steak...those juicy shrimps. Waiting to be eaten. Mmm. Tasty. *licks lips*
Chinese food! Orange chicken to be exact. It looks really juicy, doesn't it? Especially with that slice of orange right next to it. Ha, how creative. Yum. Juicy...and crunchy. With sesame sprinkled all over it. How exotic and Asian. Maybe if I eat more of it, I'll turn Chinese. Mmm mmm mmm. *salivates on your mother*
After all of this, what you should be able to accomplish is this:
Godspeed.
PS: If you have any links of enticing foods, you can post it and I'll include it. 1/4/09 11:08 PM
